~It's not the same

Uni life aint the same as it used to be.
So much change happening.
So many friends quit Swinburne and went to other uni.
well, i dnt really blame them, swinburne sucks anyway.

I dnt see much of my friends around uni,
due to different classes, different courses and of coz most are in degree.
hardly see them around, only during lunch time i see "some"

Well, not all the changes are bad.
Got some new buddies =)
feel so "syok" around them. LOL

~lazy to write now, gona continue soon. ~

Time Machine for me please =(

I laugh, I smile and I joke around people,
I may look normal in the outside,
as if nothing is wrong,
but in the inside,
Im still feeling down.
I still think about "you" every moment.
and yes, I do miss "you" alot.

I miss "you" in my life.
I really wish I could be with "you" again.
I've learn my lesson, I won't make the same mistakes again.

I've improve myself ever since that day.
"You" are the only reason that I did.
If only i could say those 3 letter words to "you" again....

Happy Chap Gor Mei!!!!

This year CNY was boring for me, all my cousins from outside Malaysia
dint come back =.="
So it was very QUIET

But everything changed on the last day of CNY =D
Despite the fact that i was still feeling BLUE due to
my "Love Life", i manage to cheer up thanks to
a "sot sot friend" haha...jk jk >.<


My family and I were invited to my dad's friend open house.
DAMN RICH GUY! =D
the dinner is very very big! many people went, everyone dint know anyone.
But throughout the dinner, manage to make some friends=)
Turns out the world is very small =P Found out that the girl who dye my hair was at the party too >.< and my cousin found one of his regular "starbucks" customer at the party as well =) Mom found some of her office friends there.
"Small world"

Here are some pictures i took at the "Party" There were alot of people!

People everywhere!

Left and right, back and front! haha


After all the guest arrive, then is "MAKAN" time.

Very long Q

The line never end! and i was hungry!!

After waiting for sooo long...i give up and went for PORK instead =D

~Yummy pork! (that is not my hand)

Got there just in time....Pork was about to finish =.=

With so many food, people will of coz get thirsty,
not to worry, there is a "Mini Bar!" hahaha

Lots and lots of BEER!

Can ask the guy to give u as much beer u want! =D
(Of coz got soft drinks and box drinks for the kids too la)

After u get all ur food and drinks,
find an empty place, sit down there,
eat & drink, then talk to anybody next to u XD

(I found a seat earlier, but whn i went to take a beer, my seat was taken=.=)

Eat dy? Full Full dy?
wait....dun forget desert! =D
Free unlimited "Ice Cream!"

You can take as many times as u want^^

after the dinner, the FINALE!
18 "Lion Dance!"
dint take pic, just video nia.
but manage to take a really
tall pole (taller than a house) that they gona climb =)

So high till cant see the top =.="
sure they get pay alot to do dat.

(I'll upload the video next time.)

After the awesome dinner, we went straight to "popo's hse"
just to wish them =)
on the way there, we saw so many lantern in the sky^^
really wanted to play it.
We tot our night was over, but as we reach my popo hse,
one lantern ngam ngam land near us!
hahaha! so LUCKY!

Thinking not to waste it,
we light it up again and lift it to the sky again =)

~The End~

~you're still in my mind

As days pass, i feel abit better,
im eating properly, i can think clearly and the dreams seem to have stop,
(but sometimes still dream abit)

Last night as i was abt to sleep,
my driving teacher called me and said that i have lesson the next day at 7am =.=|||
so late dy call then expect me to wake up so early to prepare. swt la

My driving was fine, but today it was abit bad,
while driving back home, my teacher had to break for me a few times =.=
coz all the sudden, i remember "her"

thinking the whole time, when will i ever drive her out again?
when will i have the chance to bring her out to dinner?
perhaps drive her to Uni too?

i will always miss her,
she was the best.
if i could write about all the good things about her,
it would take more than a day to complete it.

~Im not over you =(

Im still thinking of you everyday and every second,
Its hard to forget someone you love truly and deeply,
someone you have devoted your heart to,
someone you have spend together with a long time.

Im so depress, the pain in my heart has become a scar.
everyday i feel weaker and weaker.
"she" was my strength and weakness,
when "she" left, im nothing.

This morning i wake up with my tummy pain,
i realise i havent been eating properly,
i used to eat 2 plates of rice,
now i can hardly finish half plate of rice.
sometimes i even just eat half plate of rice for dinner only.
Im too depress to eat, i feel very hungry!
but i just got no appetite to eat =s

My emotions and feelings are just too strong,
or is it my "love" towards her?
I dnt knw wat to do anymore...
beside thinking wat i did and blaming myself.

~对 不 起 ! !

Im still having those dreams.
They just can't seem to stop.
Now i consider my dreams as nightmares,
because every time i wake up, i dnt feel fine.

Today i wake up wif my eyes watery.
i feel sorry for what i have done to "her".
i feel so sad and depress!
i miss "her"

why is it so hard? T.T
everyting i see, touch, hear and do reminds me of "her"
yesterday while "kan dianshi"
didi changed the channel to 615 and it was "Pucca"
"she" used to watch that before and see those characters as "us"

My heart felt so cold and heavy.
It hurts so much!

~It's all my fault ='(

I can't take it anymore...
It's the same thing over and over...
I can't make the bleeding stop.
It hurt so much!!!

Instead of nightmares, I dream of memories.
Dream of all the things "we" used to do.
It seems so real, only to wake up everyday to find out,
It was just a dream!
I feel so pain in my heart!
Sometimes i even can't breath.

I don't want to feel this pain anymore.
Make it stop!
I want to sleep forever, i don't want to wake up!
It's the only way i feel "we're" together again.
And the only way i feel everything is back to normal.

I never felt so hurt before in my life.
Why can't doctors make medicine to cure this pain!!
Even hitting the wall with my hands, my heart still feel more pain than my hands.

I can't bare this pain no longer...